


An Eyeful (Billa's Skirt)

by Lady_Juno



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Always-a-lady!Bilbo, Gen, Shouldn't have seen that, Trolls have no respect, Underwear, fem!Bilbo, girl!Bilbo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-07
Updated: 2014-05-07
Packaged: 2018-01-23 21:27:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1580108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Juno/pseuds/Lady_Juno
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Billa really should have done something about that skirt before someone decided to hang her in the air by her ankles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Eyeful (Billa's Skirt)

Billa made a breathless squeaking sound as she wriggled and squirmed, trying desperately to escape from the troll's massive paws. Her knee hurt where she'd bashed it against a tree root in her mad bid for freedom not five minutes before. Now the trolls were demanding to know what she was, but she was having a hard time formulating an answer while they were turning her over and prodding her and tugging at her limbs. The one that was holding her was dangling her by the arms, now reaching for her legs. Something yelled from down below, and the troll turned, bemused.

"Drop her!" It was Kili, wielding his sword ferociously.

"Eh? Wot'd yew say?" asked the one holding her, releasing her arm to scratch his ugly, hairless scalp. This left Billa hanging upside-down by one of her ankles. This wasn't the greatest position to be in. The halfling's skirt fell down to cover her face instead of her legs, leaving her embarrassingly green, lacy bloomers open to the air.

"I said... um..." Kili stalled in the middle of his angry yelling, his face turning red as he stared up at Billa. A moment later, just as the trolls were deciding that this creature with the sword ought to be captured as well, the rest of the Company burst into the clearing, led by a furious Thorin.

He knew that his burglar was being held by these trolls, and was likely enough to be pulled apart, and knew he couldn't afford to let that happen, not this early in their Quest. At first, none of them noticed that Kili was having trouble focusing on the task at hand, but when he glanced at his nephew, Thorin found him in the same position as he'd been when they'd entered the clearing. The trolls were baffled by these critters that kept multiplying in their camp, and were now running about their legs and slicing at their knees with ineffective little swords and axes.

When Thorin followed his nephew's gaze up to the burglar for more than a passing glance, he realized what the issue was. The mountain king turned exactly the same shade of pink that Kili already wore on his cheeks. It was due to Thorin's distraction that they were captured and shoved into sacks. It was thanks to Billa's quick thinking that they survived to see the dawn. And they all owed Gandalf a debt of gratitude for returning to save their necks.

The dwarves struggled out of their sacks with the help of the halfling and the Wizard. Billa helped Kili to his feet with a weak smile, still looking rather pale with fright from their narrow escape. The young dwarf couldn't help but give her an admiring look.

"You saved our lives, Miss Baggins."

Billa was rather surprised. It was the first time she'd ever heard Kili pronounce her name properly, and seriously. She waited for a beat, but there didn't seem to be a joke coming. "Um... well... I only did what any of you would have done in my place."

"I saw what you did- I never would have thought of that." He paused, eyes widening slightly and cheeks turning a little pink again. "That's not all I saw."

Billa looked like she might have swallowed a lemon, and turned rather red, grasping handfuls of her skirt as though to hold it down over her legs. "It's really not-"

"You have really nice-"

"SHUT UP, KILI!" Thorin had a flush hiding behind the dark scruff of his beard, a shade or three darker than his nephew's. Kili shut his mouth and scuttled away before his uncle could whallop him over the head with the flat of his blade, or something equally painful. Billa's eyes met Thorin's, and there was an unspoken understanding between them. They knew what had been seen, and what would never be spoken of again.

"That was... um... thank you."

"Don't mention it." Thorin gave her a significant look as though to add 'ever' to his words, and shook his head. "You were a fool, Miss Baggins, putting yourself in danger like that."

"Your nephew was right, Thorin," Gandalf's deep voice chuckled from the side, as the Wizard approached with his staff in hand. Thorin opened his mouth to object, but Gandalf raised a hand to belay his words. "Billa had the wit to stall for time, and that saved your lives. I expect you owe her a great debt."

Thorin scowled, seething, and shot a glance at Billa, who wilted when their eyes met. Their comradery was not meant to last, after all.

 


End file.
